Sophie Turner being MOM-SHAMED while Joe Jonas being praised for doing the bare minimum is crazy.

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What’s the deal with social media or, quite frankly, the world—giving men, especially dads, excessive praise for doing the bare minimum? Meanwhile, moms get shamed when they want to have some fun?

For context, I was mindlessly scrolling through my phone when I stumbled upon the news of the recent split between American singer Joe Jonas and Game of Thrones star Sophie Turner, a Hollywood couple whose four-and-a-half-year ‘fairytale’ marriage came to an end.

Joe Jonas files for divorce from Sophie Turner

The divorce was officially announced via a joint statement on Instagram, a post with a turned-off comment section where both Joe and Sophie expressed their mutual decision to amicably end their marriage. Reactions on the internet were divided: some were saddened by the breakup, while others left comments like ‘I saw it coming’ and ‘he/she deserved better.’

Thing is, it’s quite sus how the news and media outlets have been pushing this narrative, with insinuations and whispers that have attempted to cast Sophie Turner in a less favorable light. It all started when Joe Jonas of JoBros filed for divorce, citing the marriage as “irretrievably broken.” Until it came down to unnamed sources reporting to TMZ and Page Six basically saying, “She likes to party, he likes to stay at home. They have very different lifestyles.”

But there’s one thing that’s missing in this narrative, and that is context. Most people criticizing Sophie probably didn’t know that she’s been filming a TV series called ‘Joan’ in the UK, and so bringing her children out of the country in a busy work environment isn’t the best idea. An actress, a hard-working mother, shouldn’t be mom-shamed for working overseas while her children are in their dad’s care. To imply that her commitment to her career makes her a less devoted mother is not only unfair but also deeply rooted in gender bias.

A series of pictures of Jonas at breakfast with his daughters were circulating, which seemed like a staged photo-op from the internet’s perspective, as he was playing the active daddy role, feeding his children and being very affectionate with them, making sure it was seen from the best angle so the paps could get their most-awaited shots.

Since then, people have been suspecting that this narrative portrayed by the news and media outlets only exists because of the ‘alleged’ efforts of Joe Jonas and his PR team to mold public opinion and control the narrative to make him appear as “the caring and devoted single dad” while Turner painted the bad guy—”mom’s a negligent party animal.” Sure, these news stories may have gotten to people’s heads, making them form ridiculous opinions in the first 1-2 days, but the tables are starting to turn in favor of Sophie after that.

Honestly, reading the comments did not disappoint me. Well done, folks.

In the midst of all this, many had raised heir eyebrows with this portrayal, making Joe’s PR team’s ‘alleged’ efforts to vilify Sophie Turner fall flat. A lot of critics and social media commenters have been pointing out the glaring hypocrisy in portraying Joe as a hero for fulfilling his bare minimum parental duties. Why, they asked, is he celebrated for caring for his own children when working mothers around the world have done the same for ages? While Sophie over here is depicted as a mother who abandoned her family to indulge in a “partying lifestyle.”

Regardless of whether one is a mother or a father, whether they’re working or enjoying some leisure time, both deserve time to relax, socialize, and do whatever it is that makes them happy. A parent isn’t a ‘terrible’ parent if they sometimes choose to have a little fun around other people. Especially in Sophie Turner’s case, where she missed out on the high-school-party-girl experience of a typical teenager due to early success in her acting career and early motherhood.

At this point, it seems like Sophie Turner could never win with these so-called critics and ‘sources.’ She delves into early motherhood and marries someone at an early age, people say something like she shouldn’t rush it and she’s throwing her life away. And if she does try to have fun, people will still have something to say and tell her to stay at home, be a mom, and take care of the children.

It’s lame to shame a mother, especially if what you only saw was a picture of her having fun in a bar that was out of context anyway. And if she does go to a bar and it wasn’t because of work, guess what? It’s fucking fine too. Just like all working moms, it’s a tough challenge having to balance being a mom and a career woman. Like, damn it, leave her alone. If the roles were reversed, then Joe deserves that happiness too. Gender shouldn’t be an issue here.

This situation reminds me of the posts and comments I once saw about a guy—a social media personality, who cheated on his partner with whom he had three kids. The internet’s reaction, mostly from individuals with conservative views, was basically saying something like, “At least he still provides for his children. Bravo! You’re a real man!”

Excuse me? “You’re a real man!”? Hello? Providing for the kids is literally the bare minimum responsibility of a parent. It’s good, but it’s not something new and definitely not something to wow about. Also, I personally have gotten tired of hearing these ‘at least’ type words—it just shows how low the standards are.

Don’t get me wrong; appreciation is important. But over-applauding the bare minimum duties of the dads only highlights the double standards in today’s relationships and family dynamics. I mean sure, a simple ‘thank you’ can go a long way and make a person more motivated in doing a hell of a good job, as a lot of folks have that praise kink (lol). But know that praising and expressing gratitude are two different words with two different meanings, even though it feels like they’re the same thing.

Amidst all of these negative comments thrown at Turner, there has been no evidence that they’ve been neglectful of their children in any way; it’s just photos of her having a good time in a bar around unfamiliar faces, which were her friends and colleagues. News and media outlets just want to make it a big deal since the internet is always unhealthily hungry for pop dramas.

Sharing parenting responsibilities and structuring their modern family ‘system’ are up to them. Whatever it is that works best and can make both parties happy should be respected. This ain’t the 18th or 19th century with rigid gender roles. And guess the fuck what? Joe Jonas being seen in pictures feeding his daughters and being the loving dad that he is isn’t something to wow about. Has the standard really dropped that low? Ah no, I guess it’s been like this since 7 billion years ago.

This Joe and Sophie situation reflects a broader issue surrounding gender biases in media coverage, particularly when it comes to working mothers. Women are often scrutinized and criticized for striving to maintain their careers while raising children, a double standard that persists even in 2023. It’s a narrative that unfairly penalizes women for seeking to balance their personal and professional lives, a feat that should be celebrated, not vilified.

In closing, the attempts to vilify Sophie Turner in the aftermath of her divorce from Joe Jonas serve as a stark reminder (pun intended) of the persistent biases and unfair expectations placed on women, especially those in the public eye. Instead of letting the negativity get the best of us, why don’t we raise a toast to women like Sophie? They’re out there, breaking barriers and living life just the way they want, all while ignoring the judgmental chatter from a time when folks weren’t quite as enlightened. Long live the Queen in the North.

Both mom shaming and excessive praise for dads for doing the bare minimum should be stopped. Again, appreciation and praise are two different words.

Thoughts? Share it in the comments.

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